Experiencing The Source Of All

I was just watching a playlist of videos of Oprah’s interview with Dr. Eben Alexander, about his near death experience (NDE) that happened because of becoming very sick with meningitis. His book, Proof of Heaven, chronicled what happened to him when he left his body because it temporarily died. With his neurosurgical training, he has intimate knowledge of how our brain functions, and laid out a very convincing argument to prove to doubters and non-believers that his experience was not a hallucination produced by the physical brain. He was able to prove, through his experience, that his consciousness, who HE is, exists outside of and separately from his brain and physical body.

Even when his brain stopped functioning, and his body died, HE still existed. And he had the amazing experience of our Source Energy. His book describes what he felt and saw, and it left no doubt for him that he experienced what we call Heaven and God. Although, the term God as it’s used in today’s society is much too limiting for what he experienced, so he calls that energy Om. The Everything. The All. That was the sound he heard.

He experienced Oneness. The feeling, seeing, hearing, and knowing that we are all one energetic thing. And it’s only through our left brain that we perceive ourselves as physical and as physically distinct and separate from each other. Check out a few minutes of Dr. Jill Bolte Taylor’s experience of the left side of her brain shutting down when she had a stroke. She described the boundaries between her body and her surroundings, dissolving, melding into oneness.

She’s a doctor who studies the brain, so as she was having a stroke, she was able to watch it from the inside out. (The entire video is a great watch, but here is just the few minutes of her experience of another reality).

Having read several people’s stories of near death experiences, and stories about dead people’s death experiences as channeled through mediums, there is a common thread of an alternate reality to our everyday world. And because this reality isn’t perceived by our brains, by virtue of having a left hemisphere, most people can’t even begin to relate to it.

Even though Dr. Bolte Taylor didn’t die, she experienced consciousness outside of herself, as the left side of her brain shut down. She experienced herself as pure energy, pure consciousness.

During Dr. Alexander’s interview, as he explained how he experienced what he calls Om (because the term God is much too limiting), Oprah looked at him incredulously. She asked him if he heard what he was saying, intimating that he sounded crazy.

Well, how would you explain the unexplainable, the incomprehensible? Our human brains can’t fully grasp what it is to be without our bodies, experiencing Oneness. For eons, mankind has tried to put into words the experience of this mystical, mysterious thing called God. Religion has held the job of translation, and most churches I know describe God as a protective and loving (or mostly loving) paternal being. They describe him as a great and powerful being that exists beyond us mere mortal sinners.

How can you explain an experience to someone who has no point of reference for it? How can you explain to a person who has only ever lived in a hot desert climate and who has never even seen a picture of snow, what it is to go snow skiing? You can describe and describe, but until you put on layers of clothing, covering everything but your mouth, strap on a pair of skis, ride a lift up to the top of a freezing cold mountain, and hit the powder, you really can’t even begin to appreciate the nuances and the entirety of the experience.

Because I grew up not knowing God, I adopted a belief about it. I was taught a definition of God, and as I grew up and began to explore, my definition shifted a little bit this way or that. But one day, any faith or belief I had about God went out the window when I had an experience.

After that day, the word God became too limiting for me. God was no longer a “he” or even an individual separate from me. Well, because I perceived a voice speaking to me, part of me thought of God as a being separate from me. But at the same time, I knew that I was part of it. A spark of the divine.

It happened almost three years ago during an intensive four-day workshop. The first few days were spent doing healing exercises, building trust and a safe space, preparing us for what was to come. By the third day, we were walked step by step through a guided meditation that ended up with our meeting God in our heart.

I have to say that I was quite nervous at the prospect of meeting God. I can still remember my heart pounding at the beginning of the meditation. With child-like enthusiasm, I slid down a long, curvy slide, into a moon pool of water. The room was dimly lit by light coming up through the water. (We were guided to keep our thoughts light, fun, and like those of a child playing).

All of a sudden, everything changed. I was there with God. Because I wasn’t dead, I didn’t have the extent of the experience that Dr. Alexander did, but I remember bits and pieces of the conversation we had (because my brain was still very much functioning). I remember that a ton of information was dumped into me. But it happened so fast, my brain could only grasp bits and pieces. I was shown what looked like a gigantic Imax screen that extended from floor to ceiling, 360 degrees around me. On it I was shown many scenes of nature, of all sorts of people, mountains, and more. In that moment, I knew that I am everything and everything is me.

I saw, understood, and knew that my connection to God comes through my heart, and that I am always connected and have always been connected. I knew that God speaks to me through my thoughts all the time. ALL. THE. TIME. And the communication is subtle.

More than what was going through my head, I remember what it felt like. The feeling was so overwhelming that I was reduced to a puddle of tears. They rolled and rolled and rolled down my face and neck. The complete acceptance, and powerfully unconditional love (times a bazillion) just blew me away. Trying to put this experience into words doesn’t begin to do it justice.

Because of that experience, I know the energy that is God/ Source/ All That Is. I feel no need to prove it to anyone.

Since that workshop, I’ve connected to my divine self many times, reinforcing the knowledge that as much as God appeared to be separate from me when I connected in so deeply, that amazing energy that I felt is what I am created from. And as such, I AM that same amazing Divine Energy. As is everyone on this planet. I am a seemly separate (and yet not) aspect of Source Energy, comprised of the same qualities of unconditional love and complete acceptance.

As a distinct aspect of Divine Energy, I exist both in a human body and in spirit simultaneously. From my studies, I believe that just a portion of my total being is used to animate my human body, while the rest of my spirit resides as spirit. Connecting to my higher self is connecting to this part of me that resides in spirit, the part of me that is always with God (if you will). In energetic terms, it’s the part of my energy that never leaves Oneness.

Back in the fall of 2000, I had an experience of connecting with my higher self. The feelings began as the high energy of a storm, morphing into unbelievable power, and then into compassion and complete love. When I experienced God in 2014, the feelings I felt were much the same, only much more intensified, and accompanied by an information download.

As much as people who have had NDE’s have had their own individual experiences of God, and I have had experiences of God, still others have their own experiences through meditation or when communing with nature. Every experience is as valid and as meaningful as the next. And the common thread is the feeling of unconditional love.

If you don’t feel like you’ve really felt the presence of God, but want to, pay attention to the still small voice in your head that speaks only in the most loving voice. Listen for the voice that reaffirms your beauty and consistently encourages you, loving you through everything with absolutely no judgment. It might take some practice, but I believe you can do it. Sometimes it’s easier to hear when you’re out in nature.

The biggest take-away I hope you get from my experience, is the understanding that no matter what voices chatter away in your brain, your core essence is this indescribably beautiful, divine, sparkly,  and amazing love energy. This is what you are made of. What we are all made of.

For the past several years, I’ve been working on healing myself using a variety of forms of energy healing. Part of that process has been peeling away social programming, beliefs I took on from others, and suffering I held onto from years (and even lifetimes) ago. What’s being uncovered is everything that is left: my divinity.

If you still think you are imperfect and less than, what’s holding you back from knowing you are beautiful, perfect, and amazing?


7 thoughts on “Experiencing The Source Of All

    • You’re very welcome. Because of the amount of judgment and conditionality that is often involved in religion, it’s never called strongly to me. But then again, I’ve always gone straight for the direct source of information, or as close to the source as I can get. If I want to know about death, I seek out either people who have died and come back, or better yet, connect to people who are dead. Why only read about other people’s interpretations of God when you can feel it and experience and know it for yourself? Yes, read about others’ experiences. Sift and sort, feel your way through how they describe their feelings. Hang onto what resonates with you, until you have your own experience (if that’s even important to you).

      Liked by 1 person

      • Yes. If we all did this the world would be a different place. I love God but religion is troublesome because humans insert their judgments into it. And religion often casts human attributes to God when God is not confined by the limits we humans experience. God is everything and humans are just one little speck of God. That’s just my belief anyway, which is constantly evolving.

        Liked by 1 person

  1. My intent is not to be insulting, but this definitely is not an encounter with God. This is eastern mysticism.

    Genuine encounters with God point to the Lord Jesus Christ, and the exclusively of His redemption.

    Faith alone in the death, burial, and resurrection of the Lord Jesus Christ is God’s message to mankind.


    • I understand that your teachings differ from my own personal experience, and that is ok. I connect directly with Jesus and with God and with others whose stories were written down and re-written into what is present day Bible. So, I beg to differ that my experience was not God, because it absolutely was. But in my experience, the word God is far too limiting. I appreciate your intention though. Go well with God.


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