Without resistance to death, we very literally couldn’t survive.
But when we resist something, pressure builds, contraction builds, things get tight and brittle, until a tipping point is reached. Things explode, or implode, snap, break, and eventually let go.
I’m learning that life is a cycle of resistance. First, we resist life, and then we resist death. At the same time, life is also a cycle of allowing: first allowing life, and then allowing death. It’s a series of contractions and expansions, a series of resisting and allowing. And it’s all good.
The reason I say it’s all good, is that’s how our Source Energy works. It allows everything to be valid and acceptable just exactly as it is. Not only is everyone valid and acceptable, but so are their actions.
The feeling of pure Source Energy is that of ultimate acceptance. Ultimate allowance. No judgment of good or bad, right or wrong. No duality. Everything is valid and has value.
From the first moment that our awareness enters into a physical body, we experience our first form of resistance: gravity. We have to adjust from existing as pure energy, to existing in a physical body. And for many people, that alone presents its own challenges.
Coming out of the womb too soon, before the body is ready, leaving the dark, warm, wet, floating environment of perfect chemical balance, nestled right below our mother’s heart, can be a shock for some bodies that either never recover or become greatly affected.
As we grow and our brains develop, we go through all sorts of changes of awareness. And especially when we’re pushing through from one level to the next, our resistance to change and our resistance to those around us grows until something inside us snaps and we move on. Think of the toddler years; when we create a new awareness of ourselves as actually separate from the world. We begin to create a new identity as we push against our entire world. Around three, we develop “me”.
The Bible speaks about how God created the world in six days and on the seventh he rested. I believe this correlates to our physical brain development, because at about age six to eight is when people complete the development of awareness of themselves as separate from the world. And that development becomes complete when we are able to grasp the concept of death. Only after that point, do we have a separate awareness of “the world”.
It’s not that God literally created the world in a certain amount of time, it’s that it takes until six or so years old until we are aware of this thing called the world. A child younger than that is physically incapable of understanding “the world” as an adult understands it.
The ultimate point in child development is when we lose awareness of ourselves as immortal when we become completely aware of death. First, we have an experience where they body first develops an awareness that it could die. It pushes against a physical sensation that could end life, and for the first time is aware of life as finite.
For me, it was a time when I was playing with my older brother and he was sitting on my chest. I couldn’t breathe and my body realized for the first time, that if it couldn’t breathe it would die. I freaked out. My body freaked out and began wiring into my brain this thing called death.
And then we have an experience where we perceive that we have died. With brain wiring in my head telling me I could die, all it took was one very traumatic event for me to die, to fully and completely cement the concept of death into my body and brain. I was six. And even though my heart didn’t stop, I died. My psyche and soul fractured (more than most).
With those two events, the concept of us as immortal beings and our loss of awareness of being connected to spirit, becomes set in our mind. We now fear death and don’t know that we are more than our physical bodies. We now firmly and solidly accept ourselves and our world as completely real. What this does is ground us into the world and into our bodies.
And then again when puberty hits, and once again we create a new identity: this time as a unique individual. It’s the time when we begin to learn who we are as individuals. At first, we often feel naked and vulnerable, much like in the Garden of Eden. We have few personal boundaries, not much of a sense of who we are, and it takes years to really get there. And we all, eventually get there.
Little by little, we push against life and against restrictions and against who we used to be, to emerge from one stage to the next. We break this off here and break that off there, figuring out who we are and learning the way of the world.
Once we reach an age of maturity, as our childbearing years wane, after our forty years in the desert, our hormones once again change, allowing our bodies to lose fear of death and allow physical death. In our forties, we often begin to notice big changes in our health. Women enter menopause. Men begin to have heart attacks. Early cancers begin to hit. People have mid-life crises, and mental breakdowns. And some of us go through spiritual awakening, and even a process of crucifixion and resurrection (which in and of itself is a hell of a process of contraction and expansion).
Many become more mellow around this time of life. They begin to accept life and everything that comes along with it, letting go of all sorts of judgment and fears. Nearing the last part of our lives can bring on even greater resistance to death, or greater acceptance of life.
Eventually our bodies succumb to physical death: when our bodies and our souls reach an agreement, which we may or may not be aware of, that our mission is complete. Resistance becomes futile. Life in our body ends, and we return to pure consciousness.
What I’m learning lately, is that as an adult, once I’m firmly committed to this thing called life, where I know and accept myself as a physical person, healing all trust in myself and my trust in the world is allowing life to flow through me much more easily. Life energy can literally flow through my heart and other places in my body so much more easily. What this translates to is, more happiness, less stress, being able to figure things out much more easily, and better health. And even more than that, feeling fulfilled and grateful to be alive.
The work of healing, is becoming aware of things in life that create resistance to life, and uncovering the beliefs that have been holding them in place. Letting these old beliefs go (many of which are unconscious), allows life energy to flow through us again.
So, know that even if you are in pain and are uncomfortable, things can change for the better. If I can do it, so can you. And the beauty is, you don’t have to do what I did, just follow your heart and your intuition: they are your best guides. This is what Jesus is talking about when he says to follow him, that he is the way. It’s is the way of Christ Consciousness: following your heart’s wisdom. Just ask your heart what you need to do to feel better, and you will get an answer. It’s our direct line to Source. To God.