Healing Value

After my last healing session, the one where part of my inner child came back, I felt strong, empowered, and had energy and clarity like I hadn’t had in months. For almost a week it stayed with me. Until it didn’t. I don’t know what flipped the switch, but it probably had to do with my inner world shifting and changing, or my physical body changing to meet my new energetic template. I honestly don’t know. Might have been a bit of both.

The part of me who was ready to be addressed was the little girl in me who was raped for the first time. She knew it was wrong and to be able to cope with it she labeled herself as Used Goods. I’ve addressed a part of me who carried this same belief and healed her a number of years ago. But our consciousness exists at different levels. When this belief came up before, I associated it with when I’d given birth to a product of incest, out of wedlock. This time, the association was slightly different. Over the course of my awakening that started over three years ago, I’m revisiting things previously healed, but at my new level of consciousness.

This time, when my inner child spoke she carried blame for having just been raped by her brother, yet instantly recognized it wasn’t her fault. She reached the point of not being able to go on, and when my adult self tried to offer her help she put up a hand telling me not yet. There was more that needed to be seen and heard.

When I wondered what it was, a monster appeared looking like a dragon that was completely black. The monster grabbed my inner child by the wrist and pulled her, trying to take her away. She cried and cried, bawling that the monster was trying to steal her soul. She fought with all her might but couldn’t escape it. The monster represented my brother.

Finally, as the monster tried to take her away, we asked if it was time to bring in help. Yes. With this part of me in a tug of war for her soul, we asked for someone of the highest divine energy to come help her. Archangel Michael showed up looking pure gold, wielding his massive broadblade sword. Immediately, he sliced through the monster’s arm, setting my inner child free.

But the monster’s ugly black claw of a hand wouldn’t let go of her wrist. Try as she may, she couldn’t pry the claws from her wrist. Then an idea popped into her head! She asked Michael if she could borrow his sword to pry it off, and the moment she grasped the hilt of the sword, she completely transformed.

No longer a child, I saw a woman standing about ten feet tall, wearing robes much like those of Archangel Michael, and was pure gold. The energy she carried was pure divine strength. And her self-value grew to match her divinity. Noticing the black claws on her wrist, she gave her wrist a quick shake, sending the monster’s hand flying. She took the sword and hacked and chopped the monster to bits.

No longer Used Goods, this part of me stood tall and proud and looking over to Archangel Michael noticed he was still holding a sword. With a release of tears, she suddenly realized her value, as symbolized by her sword, was hers all along. Archangel Michael hadn’t given her his sword, he’d given her back her own. She’d only temporarily forgotten her value and strength.

It was a tremendous and very intense session, leaving me not only tired but holding a sense of my own value that is beyond money.

Because of being in the midst of dealings with the brother who molested me, I’m not at all surprised this part of my inner child came up to be healed. This is how I work. Whatever is most up in my grill at the moment is what’s ready to be addressed and healed.

So many of us have experiences in childhood that essentially rob us of our sense of value, our self worth. And a person doesn’t have to be abused. Going through anything that attaches feelings of shame will do it. The beauty of healing is it changes you from the inside out. Lets go of the inner critic and allows the divine self to flow through more and more, bringing strength and inner peace.

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